My husband is away with work this week, from Sunday afternoon to late Thursday evening, so it is just me and the kids. First of all, massive hats off to single parents! I’m finding this quite tough enough when I know it is just a temporary thing; coping day in, day out on your own must take such guts and determination.
I’m fairly used to time on my own, as husband has always worked in public transport, and the nature of the work is that when you’re moving other people round the country you can’t always stay in the same place yourself. Normally it is only for a night or two, but there are a few techniques I’ve learnt to help me cope:
- Be strategic about washing. Seriously. Do whatever it takes to avoid having to bathe and wash the hair of two children by yourself on the same evening. And plan your own showers in advance, begging/bribing older children to look after younger ones while you attempt a level of basic cleanliness.
- Get the treats in. I bought some maple syrup and raisin pancake in Marks and Spencer’s yesterday, and we had them for breakfast this morning with chopped up strawberries and yet more maple syrup drizzled (alright, poured) over, and it definitely brightened the start of our day. Plus, I’m pretty sure maple syrup has some kind of super food benefits, non?
- FaceTime doesn’t really work for us because when husband is away he tends to be working long/unpredictable hours, but I make little videos of the children talking to him on my phone, and he videos himself replying, and they can watch those over again when they’re missing daddy.
- Eat things your other half doesn’t like. On the sofa. With the gas fire on high.
- Get the children to sleep (I know, I know, those five little words conceal a world of pain), and then head to bed yourself with a good book. 9 or 10 hours sleep, while not entirely compensating for the absence of the love of your life can be an excellent consolation.
- Get all your female friends round, blow the housekeeping budget on prosecco and book a group of male strippers. Or alternatively, put your dressing gown on as soon as you’ve done the afternoon school run and curl up on the sofa with a cat and a vat of hot chocolate to watch GBBO. I’ll definitely be doing one or the other of those this evening…
I am looking on the bright side. I live in an age of readily available dry shampoo and Kindles, so I can get away without washing my hair if WWIII seems likely to break out in my absence, and I am guaranteed not to run out of things to read. Also, I get to really look forward to seeing my husband at the end of the week, and really appreciate how much easier things are when he is around (even though I frequently moan about how tough they are), and realise that, despite his inability to make a cup of coffee without covering 85% of the kitchen surfaces and floor with coffee grounds, I do love him very much, and miss him very much, and am very lucky to be in a marriage where that is the case.